Healing at a Bathhouse is a autobiographical journey of a queer man coming of age in tension with his faith, sexuality, and mental health.

Told through the lens of the present—working inside a gay men’s bathhouse—Ben reflects on the path that brought him here: early encounters with sexuality, the confusion and shame that followed, and the deep imprint they left on him. From childhood experiences he didn’t yet understand, to the rigid structure of Catholicism, to serving in the military under Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, his story traces how oppression, desire, and identity collide.

As Ben steps into manhood, exploring relationships, coming out, and navigating a growing, trauma-induced pattern of obsessive thoughts and compulsions—he finds himself caught in the question of how to be. These tensions ultimately lead to a breaking point—a mental health crisis shaped by obsessive compulsive disorder.

Now, inside the bathhouse, landing in a safe environment where he is learning to make sense of his experiences, something begins to shift. What once represented fear becomes a place of healing. Through quiet conversations and a willingness to face himself while cleaning mirrors, Ben begins to rebuild his relationship with faith, sexuality, and mental health.